Tuesday, 24 November 2020

Ode to Gold Hill

 Gold Hill is a bold hill

As steep as steep can be

At the top it's a fair old drop
But so much there to see

Wow and whoosh! The sheer drama of the panorama 
Is wondrous to behold
You could be flying on a magic carpet
But you're not you've just been told

'Course it was famously shot by Ridley Scott
For the Hovis brand
To the plaintive strains of a colliery band
And wasn't that just grand?!

[Hums] Daa-dee-daa
Dee-da=da
Daa-daa-daa dee-dee

But beyond the cobbles 
And beyond the bread
There's a lot more to Shaftesbury 
It must be said

Just Listen to Alfred
It's on every day
If you're local you can listen to Alfred
And have your say

Shaftesbury to Semley, Motcombe to Melbury 
You'll not be left out
What about the Donheads?! I hear you shout

Yes, Donheads St Andrew, St Mary, St James 
All within reach ~ not out of range
Community gossip, anything topical, anything strange

You text, you message, you post, you tweet
See? It's all rather slick and rather neat

[Hazel interjects]
You can record yourself too
Like you're fond to do

Captured on podcasts so it all lasts
Forever and a day.
Marvellous, eh?!

[Hazel again]
Aaaargh! 

Wednesday, 18 November 2020

Listen With Alfred Interview Nov 27

Fwd: Tweet from Cygnet Gallery (@GalleryCygnet)

---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Ginette
Date: Wed, 18 Nov 2020 at 15:13
Subject: Re: Tweet from Cygnet Gallery (@GalleryCygnet)
To: Grenville


Hi Grenville & Hazel,

It was lovely to hear from you again; so sorry for not replying to your earlier emails ~ I'm so not up to speed at the moment.  Do you think Jackie was already planning to move into your attic when she found your new house for you?!  I can't imagine that she thought you would agree to it. Well done Hazel for immediately saying no.  Is she still ringing you a lot and wanting to chat for ages?  And Grenville, is her dog still alive? I remember you saying it wouldn't last much longer!

Thank you so much for this email.  I loved your poem Grenville, and Hazel's singing at the end.  You two are becoming celebrities on local radio, and definitely stand out from some of the other locals (yokels)!

We are alright thank you ~ hope you two are as well.  The sunny autumn days have been beautiful here. I've had some lovely walks in between the dark wet days.

Please keep in touch, you always make me smile.

All the best to you both,

Ginette






-----Original Message-----
From: Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com>
To: latham.b@sky.com
CC: ginetterainbow@aol.com
Sent: Tue, 17 Nov 2020 23:37
Subject: Tweet from Cygnet Gallery (@GalleryCygnet)

Cygnet Gallery (@GalleryCygnet) Tweeted:
#BigThumbsUp๐Ÿ‘from our artist @grenvilleallen and wife #HazeltheMallMoll to @ListenToAlfred: https://t.co/W2Mv0BbpgO https://twitter.com/GalleryCygnet/status/1328677672130662400?s=20

Just tap on the visual link of #HazeltheMallMoll & myself to hear my recital of the little ditty I've written. Hazel comes in at the end SINGING!

Hope you're all well. 

All our fondest

Grenville 

        Grenville Allen
www.grenvilleallen.com

Tuesday, 17 November 2020

Ode to Gold Hill written & recited by Grenville Allen

With SFX by #HazeltheMallMoll
 

  
Grenville 
Allen
    f i n e   a r t i s t 

Thursday, 22 October 2020

Daft bat in one's loft

---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com>
Date: Thu, 22 Oct 2020 at 11:33
Subject: Re: PR
To: ginetterainbow


'Morning Ginette

Lovely to hear from you ~ with such kind comments too.

I expect you and Melvin are well over your respective ailments by now. Keeping up with the ever-tip-top felines in your household!๐Ÿˆ

Anyway, as regards your mention of Jackie and brownie points last night's v protracted phone call from Jackie (as they always are with her) revealed an awful hankering for her to convert our loft and for her to live up there in a self-contained flat! OMG! Aaargh!

Fortunately we spent six weeks in her company during the cross-over from E Sussex to N Dorset so we know first-hand what a nightmare she is. Hazel immediately told her "No way!"

She still hasn't opened that link I sent you re the radio interview. That's how weird she is.

Thought I'd just keep you in the loop re Jackie. I'm sure there'll be further developments to tell you about soon.

Here btw is a poem they've seen and heard me recite recently on Twitter. The radio controller said I need a better mic to air it on their radio station: " Thanks Grenville. Could you try re-recording it using a voicememo app on your phone. You need to be a bit closer for radio! Voicerecord Pro is a good app if you don't have one!"

Gold Hill is a bold hill

As steep as steep can be

At the top it's a fair old drop

But so much there to see
Wow and whoosh! The sheer drama of the panorama
 
Is wondrous to behold

You could be flying on a magic carpet

But you're not you've just been told

All our fondest
 

  
Grenville 
Allen
    f i n e   a r t i s t 


On Thu, 8 Oct 2020 at 14:53, <ginetterainbow@aol.com> wrote:
Hi Grenville and Hazel,

Thank you so much for this link.  It's really lovely to see you both looking so well, you haven't aged at all, and good to hear your voices again.

Wow, what an amazing story, How many brownie points did Jackie earn when she found your house?!  And all the background to where you are now was so interesting.  I loved hearing about your eyebrows too, Grenville, how lucky are you to have Hazel to keep you looking well groomed?!

It sounds like you are very happy there and that things are going well for you.  I'm so pleased for you both.

Melvin and I are alright, he's had a bad cough and cold for about a month now, and I've suddenly got a bad back, the cats are doing well though!  He's still working hard, and I'm still happily retired, the last five years have just flown by.

It's always great to hear from you, thank you for keeping in touch.

Take care and stay safe.

Wishing you both all the very best,

Ginette x


-----Original Message-----
From: Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com>
To: latham.b@sky.com
CC: ginetterainbow@aol.com; Glyn Wakefield <glyn.wakefield@sky.com>
Sent: Wed, 30 Sep 2020 11:09
Subject: PR

Tee-hee!

 
  
Grenville 
Allen
    f i n e   a r t i s t 

"Like having a daft bat in your loft!" said Hazel


Funniest thing I've heard today!๐Ÿ˜‚
 

  
Grenville 
Allen
    f i n e   a r t i s t 

Friday, 9 October 2020

EYE-CATCHING ADVERTISING

Date: Fri, 9 Oct 2020 at 07:53
Subject: EYE-CATCHING ADVERTISING



A few words of warning from an old ad pro:
It is a complete waste of money and time running invisible/wallpaper advertising.

Imagine my frustration when none of my body copy I spent time crafting nor my headline has been actioned. 

I've written for Ferrerro Raffaello "The light white bite", "Whoop it up with Vimto", "Have You Been Grabbed By The Grunhalles?" for a Greenall Whitley lager (the accompanying beer mats I wrote for the tv commercial I also wrote are still selling on Ebay), 78-sheet poster for Air France on the Hammersmith flyover: "A FLOCK OF FLIGHTS. A PRIDE OF STAFF. NO HERDS." Eurocamp: "Fun in the sun for under a ton!". And so on ~ over a 25 year period. Below is just one of my award-winning ads I came up with for the NSPCC....



I was paid enough to wear coats like the above and drive a black company BMW. 

All because I came up with eye-catching advertising. You see, it pays to advertise!
 
  
Grenville 
Allen
    f i n e   a r t i s t 

Saturday, 3 October 2020

"Grenville, you're becoming quite a local celebrity, I hear!"

Grenville Allen (@grenvilleallen) tweeted:
Super-duper interview with Keri from @ListenToAlfred. And it's equally super-duper that he took shots of what was happening. Just click on ๐Ÿ‘‰https://t.co/Oo3LJ5Rzwu
 

  
Grenville 
Allen
    f i n e   a r t i s t 

Monday, 21 September 2020

10%/15% offer


---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com>
Date: Sun, 20 Sep 2020 at 08:01
Subject: Re: Advertising leaflet
To: CLAIRE 

Just email everyone. The kitchen's not well-frequented ~ especially by those not doing a shift. We've been told to lessen our carbon footprint so the less printed off the better.

As an addendum, I think setting sales targets in the shop would also be a good incentive for people to sell more of everyone's wares in the Cygnet. See if anyone can top a certain figure like Hazel & I have at 500. It's fun. I even get dressed up to do it!


  
On Sat, 19 Sep 2020 at 22:29, CLAIRE WATERS <claire.waters@live.co.uk> wrote:

Hi All
Would you like me to put a list in the kitchen when I am in on Monday morning  for people to tick/ sign if they would like to take  part in offering 10%-15% off their work during Nov/Dec just to see who is interested in promoting this idea ? And yes maybe if they spend a certain amount, although if certain people don't opt in this could create  a problem if a customer buys multiple pieces of work and one of those artists doesn't wish  to take part in the discount offer.
Claire


Tuesday, 15 September 2020

Clenched fist time!


---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com>
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 2020 at 16:00
Subject: Re: Cygnet Finances survey - closing date 4.30pm on Monday 14th September 2020
To: Lindsay Keir 

Phew! ๐Ÿ‘
 

  
Grenville 
Allen
    f i n e   a r t i s t 


On Mon, 14 Sep 2020 at 15:57, Lindsay Keir <lindsaykeir@hotmail.com> wrote:
Everyone is entitled to their opinion. I feel preached at now. 
Let's leave it as it is. 
Lindsay

Sent from my iPhone

Lindsay finally, petulantly gives up!

---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Lindsay Keir
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 2020 at 15:57
Subject: Re: Cygnet Finances survey - closing date 4.30pm on Monday 14th September 2020
To: Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com>


Everyone is entitled to their opinion. I feel preached at now. 
Let's leave it as it is. 
Lindsay

Sent from my iPhone  

My exasperated response to that!

---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com>
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 2020 at 15:48
Subject: Re: Cygnet Finances survey - closing date 4.30pm on Monday 14th September 2020
To: Lindsay Keir 

Don't be daft, Lindsay. There are all sorts of souls. We're the 'quirky' sort, which if you look it up in the dictionary is also a good apposite word.

Anyway, let's not worry about the little things, Lindsay. The amount of people we've approached who say that nothing ever gets done at the Cygnet ~ and have heard about all the politicking there. It really has got a bad reputation.

Let's try and do and do something about that!
 

  
Grenville 
Allen
    f i n e   a r t i s t 

Lindsay's still not happy ~ something's niggllng her...

---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Lindsay Keir
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 2020 at 14:40
Subject: Re: Cygnet Finances survey - closing date 4.30pm on Monday 14th September 2020
To: Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com>


To me a 'soul' is someone to be pitied or to feel sorry for. 

Sent from my iPhone

My 1st reply to Lindsay

 ---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com>
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 2020 at 12:22
Subject: Re: Cygnet Finances survey - closing date 4.30pm on Monday 14th September 2020
To: Lindsay Keir

You sound just like one of the clients I used to work with in London. They always came round to my approach in the end. My mate, who I worked alongside, is Trevor Beattie who came up with FCUK. Imagine the difficulties in getting that one through.๐Ÿ˜ฑ

We are quirky souls. And all the better for it. And the professional sound comes from the fact we don't take ourselves too seriously. Hence the self-deprecatory humour.

A top award-winning London creative director called Paul Dominet has very much approved my line by immediately following the account.

As did top creatives Steve Lilley and Andrew Marshall of MarshallCartoons. And Bristol-based Lone Hoof. They all immediately followed. 

Just now Keri of This Is Alfred, who also followed, is just arranging to come round to interview me on the strength of this 'quirky souls' business.

We've got to stay positive, be interesting! With thirty followers already the proof's in the pudding!

All the best๐Ÿ‘๐ŸŽจ
 

  
Grenville 
Allen
    f i n e   a r t i s t 

Lindsay's response to the new Twitter account I've set up for Cygnet

 ---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Lindsay Keir
Date: Mon, 14 Sep 2020 at 11:49
Subject: Re: Cygnet Finances survey - closing date 4.30pm on Monday 14th September 2020
To: Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com>


Hi Grenville 
I'm not sure I like being described as a 'quirky soul'. 
We should sound more professional than that in my opinion. 
Any other phrases we could use instead? 
It's great to publicise us and I support what you're doing, it's just those two words that don't sit right with me. 
All the best 
Lindsay


Sent from my iPhone

On 14 Sep 2020, at 11:32, Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com> wrote:


Here's the immediacy of Twitter, Claire. I'd just posted the fact that you're in this right now: just click on this!

<image001-711095-791858-756319-733170-703183.jpg>

  
Grenville 
Allen
    f i n e   a r t i s t 

Saturday, 12 September 2020

Fwd: Your presence on the new Twitter account I've set up

---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com>
Date: Sat, 12 Sep 2020 at 11:21
Subject: Re: Your presence on the new Twitter account I've set up
To: Yve Sturgeon 

To see it in context just click here!
 



Yve Sturgeon's presence on Twitter and her backing of me!


 ---------- Forwarded message ---------
From: Yvonne Sturgeon 
Date: Sat, 12 Sep 2020 at 11:47
Subject: Re: Your presence on the new Twitter account I've set up
To: Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com>


Gosh Grenville,

Thank you so much, what an ab fab thing to do for me.
Seriously, Thank you.
Unfortunately l do not twitter, l have tried to get the app which shows l already have an account, and wont let me in or give me a new pass word.  Am stumped as to what to do next.

I am so very sorry about the abuse you received from Colin, to be honest it took me a full day and a half to work out who he was...never seen him, never sold one of the half dozen unchanging  copper pieces either.  You gave him the great honour of comparing him to Heath Robinson, clearly he does not know the artist, and took the use of comparison to trumpery work.
That's his insecurity in his work at play me thinks..
Such a shame. I was looking forward to your leadership.
Say Hi to Hazel for me, l LOVED the way she reacted and look forward to meeting you both at some point๐Ÿ˜Š

XX Yve


From: Grenville Allen <grenvilleallen@gmail.com>
Sent: Saturday, September 12, 2020 11:18:31 AM
To: Yve Sturgeon <yve.sturgeon@hotmail.com>
Subject: Your presence on the new Twitter account I've set up
 
'Morning Yve


๐Ÿ‘๐ŸŽจ
 

  
Grenville 
Allen
    f i n e   a r t i s t